Wherever we are right now in life is traceable to the decisions
and actions we made in the past. Therefore, I am a unique embodiment of everything
in the past. This got me thinking, why am I this person now and what were the
things, big or small, that shaped me?
If you had the chance to read a couple of my entries here on
this blog, you may recognize the suggestions of positivism in each of them.
Perhaps you see a pattern of me trying (at times too hard) to show to you that
there’s a better way – that positivity is just right at the corner. I’d like
you to know that I am not the person I am today if it weren't for the
cornerstones that I’m made of.
I’d say that I’m proud for these cornerstones for it made me
see life differently. I believe that they saved me from my old self who is a depressive
guy, waiting for the world to end while hoping for nothing. Don’t get me wrong.
I am in no way saying that I’m perfect or better than any of you, I am just
here to share how I reach such thoughts and how these thoughts enabled me to lay
most of my insecurities and fears down consequently allowing me to dream higher and deeper. In short, this is an
attempt for me to reach out and tell you why in the world I think like "this and that." If you’re interested,
then read on.
PALS
This is a main turning point for me and I can easily admit
that this cornerstone is the precursor why I prefer positive perspectives in
life. PALS stands for Personal Awareness Leadership Seminar. You can say that
it is about leadership, but what really made an impact on me is the personal
awareness part of it. It opened my eyes to many things. In fact, if you join
this seminar, you’d be surprised that almost everything I talk here on this
blog is based from the things I learned from there.
In this seminar, you re-discover that you have infinite
potential. It also teaches you that you are responsible for your life. Furthermore,
it imparts very interesting ways on how to communicate with people emphasizing
on the types of listening and handling difficult situations. Most of all, it
helps you understand the “oneness” of the world. I’m confident to say that the
lessons you learn from this seminar saves you half of a lifetime of learning if
you were to learn them on your own. It’s a crash course to life.
Books
I am no book reader. The truth is it takes me ages to finish
a book. However, I could never deny the importance of them. Self-help books are
what keep me motivated. It refreshes my mind and it helps me stay in the right
track. They’re great for references when faced with situations. They’re also
very relatable.
I continuously read books that keep the dreamer in me. If I were
to recommend books, I’d include the following: Rich Dad Poor Dad, Think and Grow Rich (where philosophies of PALS are based from), Psycho-cybernetics, and
books from notable successful people like Dale Carnegie, Warren Buffet, Brian Tracy
and so on. I have to admit, there are a lot of books but you can actually see a
clear pattern from most of them. There’s this one message and that’s, “If they
can do it, you can do it.“
IF
It’s already been proven that when you surround yourself with
positive and supportive people, you get to become one as well. I never thought
I’d find them in the Immanuel Fellowship group, a church that I belong with. These
church friends of mine, although they may not know it, keep me motivated to do better
things in life. You may not agree with me, but the church has a lot of positive
things that can keep you going. From what I see it, it’s easy to form dreams
just by being part of a group that has a mission to reach out and serve. I
don’t want to be bias on this, but basically, you can have any group as long as
they support you and your dreams, or at the very least, keep you a dreamer. It’s
just that, you’ll find them mostly in such congregations who have a vision
mission to reach out.
Immanuel is worth the mention since it’s a venue for me to continuously
strive and become better just because I discovered a purpose other than myself.
You’d realize that there are bigger things than us, and sometimes the bigger things
keep us away from the boring, mundane, and destructive smaller issues, which by
that I mean the dramas we think we have, the minor discomforts, and so on.
Ideas
I don’t know if my ideas come solely from the seminar or books,
my unique experiences, my “we-are-infinite” way thinking, or the combination of
all these. The point is my ideas are now different than what they were before. I
discovered that one can meet tons of ideas when one looks at the big picture and think out of the box. I may be wrong,
but I think if you have such a thought process, your ideas encompass a lot of
things and not just anything restricted.
Formulating positive ideas and acknowledging them as my own
is one aspect that I didn’t expect to be a cornerstone. What I know is that you
are your thoughts. Thoughts form attitudes, attitudes form habits, and habits
form “you” as seen by the world.
Vision and Expectations
Do you know about Pygmalion theory? If you do, then I’m
actually setting high expectations for myself. If you don’t, then Pygmalion
theory is just the theory that people act accordingly on what society expects
from them. Basically, if the people around you expect you to become great, then
you’re more likely to become one for you subconsciously try to meet those
expectations. The sad part is when they don’t expect much from you.
Actually, I found a hack on this. You just need to set high
expectations for yourself and act as a standalone source of expectations. This
enabled me to have a clear vision what I will be 5 years from now or even 10
years from now. I can see a clear picture of myself. I know it can be crazy
(even delusional) of me, but no, I’m just setting high expectations for I
deserve the best even if it is just lies in my imagination. I know eventually
that people will see these expectations I set for myself, thus inadvertently you
dictate them what to expect from you. And there goes your Pygmalion theory
hack.
As you noticed, I never included my formal education in the
list. I think my formal years of study have not developed me much as the person
I am now. It’s ironic to say that what I learned in college is not so helpful to
me now. However, I would never forget the great mentors that contributed along
the way. If I were to choose my own path, I’d rather had done self-study (or a
more focused form of study) and learn from actual experiences and people who
really made it. But it’s also important to note that we’re better off with no
regrets. We don’t have to be too radical. It’s important to consider that each
step, no matter how useless or long it may seem, is necessary for anyone to
reach the now. Your past tenses are essentially
what bring you to your present tenses.
After sharing all these cornerstones to you, I’d now like to
ask you several questions. What do you think are the influences in your life
that led you to think the way you think right now? What are the cornerstones of your life that built who you are right now? What will you do if no one stops
you from becoming what you want? What will you do if you can be what you wanted
5 or 10 years from now? Will you still settle for less? I hope not and I hope you
continuously strive and build a firm foundation. I bet my 25 centavo that it’s better to aim high. Therefore,
I’m going to leave you with this, “Always dream higher than the sky and deeper
than the ocean.”
(All photos used in this post copyright of Kevin Abad)
(All photos used in this post copyright of Kevin Abad)
