Staying Where You Are Is Killing You

Staying Where You Are Is Killing You
The easier way is almost considered the best way for a lot of people. However, little do we know that in life, things such as shortcuts, lotteries, luck, and the sort are all but illusions. That is why staying where you are is killing you more than you think. Going for the easier path is frequently the one that takes longer, not to mention a chance of misdirection.

Before you go thinking if what I’m saying is full of crap, consider these points first:

1. You actually have higher chance of getting in an accident in your way to buying a lottery ticket than actually winning one

I don’t agree with “get lucky mentality.” I believe that the instance of luck is close to impossible. I’m a firm believer that every occurrence in life happens for a reason.

All inventions and success stories are definitely not made out of luck. Thomas Edison couldn’t have made the first light bulb without acting on his ideas and meeting several failures.  Manny Pacquiao didn’t just get lucky on each of his fight to earn his titles. All successful people were not lucky, but they took actions that got them to where they are.

Think for yourself: Consider people in your life that you think are successful, then think how they got there. No matter how much you think they are lucky for having this or that, they still won’t be there without their efforts and ideas.

2. No one really acquired so much wealth when one works for someone else

Planned on staying an employee forever? Think twice. You may be in the race for nothing. Not unless you have your job as part of a bigger plan, going to work will be very meaningless.

Don’t get into thinking that you will be rich just because you’re working. And retirement money is too far in the future to even consider enjoying the thoughts of it.

3. Not making a decision is actually a risky decision

Sometimes, not choosing something for your own is actually the greatest of all risks. You may say that you don’t want to decide right now for the main reason that you are afraid to decide or make a stand. But doing so, on not deciding what you want or where you’re heading or even mundane things on what food to order, eats away precious time that you could never get back.

Sometimes we spend most of our time transfixed with indecision and discover (sometimes too late) that we wasted our lives just by doing that.

Furthermore, I read in a book that most successful people have a habit of making fast decisions. They don’t waste time, instead they weigh circumstances faster and make a move. They’ll deal with the issues once they arise but more importantly they reap the lessons they learn from these quick decisions – which eventually develops what we call intuition and gut feeling. Gut feeling, as you know, is almost always right.

4. You only live once, why make it ordinary?

This is really interesting (thanks to all those YOLO stuff over the net). Actually, it has a big point. We are only blessed with one life and we never know what will happen after we die.

I feel awful seeing people going through life as if they are chasing ghosts. They seem to go through it not appreciating the beautiful details of it. I think we should be more observant, see more beauty, create more new and interesting ideas and really act on them. The possibilities are endless.

5. No one asked you to stay where you are

If you are a smoker because your friends smoke or because you are accustomed to it, let me tell you one thing, no one asked you to stay like that. This goes to almost all aspects in our lives especially as it concerns with behaviors and habits.

You don’t have to stay an addict forever, you don’t have to stick with your job just because your friends are there or your family tells you so. You make the rules.

In addition, you have so much more potential than you can ever imagine. Maybe it’s about time to make use of it.

How to get out of this cycle?

Think differently

Look at the big picture. Life is not about staying in one place. Life is about going out there. Seeing the big picture. Hitting that bucket list. It’s about dreaming big things and achieving them one by one. If you ever had that itch inside you, then attend to that itch – feed your mind with beautiful realizations for things are better when we see it differently.

There is always a way

Every problem has a solution. Cliché right? That’s because every freaking problem always have a solution.

Don’t easily believe what other people say

Turns out those who talk a lot about how you should do this and that are the ones who haven’t actually tried it. It’s amusing on how a lot of people tell you that your idea wouldn’t work when they themselves haven’t even tried it.

Well, newsflash: only you know how important your goals and ideas are. No one can really fully understand them not even your wife or any of your closest friends. So set out for what you believe in. No one is really stopping you but yourself. And it should be that way, don’t blame anyone for not accomplishing your dreams. Besides, they are your dreams after all.

The best is yet to come

One reason why we stay where we are and give up the desire to move forward is we think that we have the best or the worst case already.

Say, you have the perfect job in the company, you went high up the corporate ladder and then you stay. But is it really the best? Have you reached the top? I don’t think so. There will always be something better – something more is out there.

This goes the same with thinking that you have the worst situation already – that you’ll never get out of this big predicament you have. We all had that feeling (some of us may never have escaped from it). But if you just think hard enough, you’d realize that there is a lot more “worst things” to come. The point is, it will not stay that way forever. Nothing stays forever.

So rejoice and be merry for you have a chance to develop yourself, to move, to get away from where you are. As long as we have life we are always meant to grow. Don't stay where you are if it's killing you! Leave the stagnancy to the volcanoes, erupt today and feel life. And if you don’t like where you are, change it. You’re not a tree!

How To Truly Understand And Appreciate People

How To Truly Understand And Appreciate People
We always have people we get along with and some that we can’t stand. We can easily name one or two irritating people in a room.

More often than not, we give in and flag them useless -- people who don’t have to be part of our lives or our attention. Well, that’s fine. I mean we have all the right to pick the people who stay in our lives, right?

Not exactly…

What if we need to work with them to reach our goals? What if they happen to be a direct family? Are we still able to eradicate them in our lives?

I’m also afraid to say that any person who comes into our lives always have something to offer – and we need them, whatever that is they‘re offering.

“People are either blessings or lessons”

Everyone heard stories of enemies from before now becoming allies. And perhaps you’ve heard about the saying, “Never burn bridges? “

There’s a truth to them because we never know how the person can affect our lives.

So why shut them down in the first instance?  Why let an opportunity of great camaraderie easily slip away?


What if you develop a skill that helps you cope with the worst kind of people?

Would that make the world a better place? Would that make you more friends? Would that make work or life a lot easier?

I think it does.

Therefore, I’d like to share this very simple technique that most of the time helped me figure out the way people think and perform. I strongly believe that this technique is perfect in avoiding conflicts and bridging the gaps between one another.

The technique I’m referring here is:

Handling the Four Types of Personalities

Yes! There are primarily four types of personalities and for each person, one personality is dominant. Learning about this gives you a good chance on understanding others.

The four types of personalities are controller, analyst, promoter, and supporter.

You probably heard of this already. I’ve encountered this myself way back in college. However, I haven’t realised the value of it not until I’ve discovered it in a seminar. I’d definitely want to share this enlightenment to you.

But to do that, I will give you a brief definition and example for each type.


~They’re the formal and dominant type. They like challenges, competition, position, and winning. These are the boss, the ones who love to debate, and voice their opinion. They dislike laziness, procrastination, and tardiness.

 e.g: Boss, Dictators


~They’re the formal “flow with” people who like neatness, planning, structure, and details. Analysts dislike being pushed, restricted, negativity, and wasting time.

 e.g: Strategist, Planners


~These are the party guys who are usually creative, outgoing, innovative, dynamic, and fun. They find it hard to deal with rules and hates to feel being helpless.

 e.g: The “Idea guy,” life of the party


~These are the ones who are not so formal and very flow-with type of personality. They like affection, peace, and approval. They never like conflicts, intimidation, and pressure.

 e.g: Family guy, emotional

How This Mix Up

It is believed that the world is composed equally of all these personality types. This also means that there’s nothing wrong if you fall into a certain type. Each has its benefits and weaknesses.

In a usual scenario, controllers would likely conflict with a supporter compared to another controller or analyst. While analyst may find their ideas different with a promoter who’s outgoing and seems to be out of focus most of the time (because of the flight of ideas in his/her head).

Your job however is to empathize on the person you’re dealing with. If you think they’re supporters, then don’t break their heart. If they’re controllers, then don’t waste their time and go straight to the facts. Promoters? Enjoy the time with them. Analyst, show them data or facts and you’ll get along.

The thing is you should appreciate that each person is unique and you no longer blame their actions. This skill is hard to apply at first, but you'll eventually get used to it over time. The results however are tremendous!

Furthermore, it is said that a true leader knows how to deal all the personality types. You also can be that kind of person.

Come to think of it, a leader is a perfect example of a person who truly understands and appreciates people around him/her.

Everyone Is Beautiful

Everyone is Beautiful!

The big question is, how can we give people a chance when we fail to see them as a person? That’s a tricky one, we usually consider people as someone we could make use of – yes, more like an object when in fact it’s not supposed to be that way.

People are people – and they certainly have their worth.

“The true test of men is how he deals with someone of no value to him”
I always believe that we are all connected. I’m not saying that you should have this belief. But I just want you to consider that people always have goodness in them –- no matter how dark or scant it is from their outside.

If you look hard enough, you’d see the beauty within them.

Everyone Deserves a Chance

Lastly, we have no right to give up on people. Everyone deserves a second chance just like others giving you another chance.

Never give up on anyone!

Once you have this kind of mindset, I strongly believe that you will truly understand and appreciate people.

What are you waiting for? Spread the love! “Better late than never!”

P.S. Can you really avoid conflicts? Just “think before you act.”

(If you haven’t yet, do like the Facebook page for more inspiration!)