I have a problem with writing that is, I don’t know how to write. I always feel unskillful with the way I put my ideas to words; and I’m going to be honest I don’t know how to construct a sentence, effectively that is.
I came to know myself as more of an idea guy who can’t relay his message properly. I see this because when I speak, people either don’t get me or don’t listen.
Furthermore, when I had a writing job before, I always get negative feedbacks from the copywriter. They said that I just don’t sound well, the voice, it’s not native sounding, improper use or not using idioms the right way, ideas are not cohesive or congruent, etc. Unfortunately at that time, I got so overwhelmed with the comments that I dwell on it and eventually lose the job.
This became like a disease to me. Each time I want to say or write something, The thought of me spreading inferior grammar and all comes to my head almost automatically. Because of this, I decided not to write instead. Well, as you might have guess, the results are unproductivity and eventually depression. This goes on a cycle.
How I manage to get off the loop
However, It wasn’t long that I realized that there are reasons to keep going and to write no matter what. It’s amusing that recognising my lapses and the process on how this got me depressed, both allowed me to think. Eventually, I tried to find meaning in my incompetence and learn to acknowledge them. As of the moment, I still suck in writing. But one thing is for sure, a year ago, or even a month ago, I was suckier.
Thanks to my reading of uplifting books and having an open mind while listening to moving speakers, I discovered that there are many more reasons to keep on going. Here are some of them that applied well to me.
Laughing stock
I learn to laugh at myself. Sometimes when I look back from the past, and thought of my wrong decisions, I smirk (sometimes alone) as I realize how awful a decision maker I was. This also goes true to my writing. I know I’ll look at this 5 or 10 years from now. By that time, I’ll be “better” and I’ll see these posts and laugh at them. How I was such a loser and all. But if weren’t for those stepping-stones, I wouldn’t be here.
There’s nothing you can’t learn
One thing about us humans is that we adapt and learn things. As long as we keep on doing things, we continuously learn and improve on doing those things. So if I keep on writing, then probably I’d get better. There’s no telling when, but it’s already sort of certain.
A higher purpose
I discovered a higher purpose. I really wanted to share my thoughts about the world. I am also a fan of success stories and I want my life story to be successful someday. This is why I share strategies, learning, and secrets I learned from mentors, YouTube videos, Google, blogs and so on. I want to share these to people, especially to those who want to improve too. You might say I am a wannabe financial advisor as you look at my recent posts. But hey, I don’t see anything wrong with that; and probably I don’t care what you think at all.
As usual thanks for reading this post. Hope you always keep in mind that we can become who we wanted as long as we keep on moving forward.
